29-01-2022

 These days I don't even know what to document as my feelings. 

I'm a bit scared of everything,

Scared of dreaming,

Scared of not dreaming,

Scared of living,loving,too scared of not living and loving and caring. 

I'm afraid because I don't know what the right thing is, as both are burdens that have consequences. 

You might think I should follow the road that I think will produce good results,but the thing is I don't know which way is which. 

I don't want to care for the wrong people,get hurt and neglect myself..And I don't want to be selfish just to realize I've lost the people that truly cared about me.

I don't want to dream up and be expectant of a Life that is not God's will for me,

A path I'll never walk cause it was not for me .

But the key to greatness is in dreaming right?

So how do i keep on dreaming and not jinx it?

Dream and not get stuck being a dreamer?

I want to achieve things that shock me.

Things that I didn't even think of dreaming. Great things like that. 

Sighs.

Help me God.